I read this entire thread and feel for ya, news. I moved away from HD and have not looked back. While I've not had this same issue you are having, the seat (and other) problems Dave has had, I have had MANY issues on other things MoCo related for over 30 plus years of ownership and 40 plus dealing with Harley...and had to ask forgiveness more than a few times for some of the words I've used.
I am not saying the grass is greener on the other side with another brand but at least the other side I chose has green grass and better customer service (and a much better ride, stock). I was hesitant to move but did my homework and jumped. Maybe this is the push you need to move.
I don't know if I will ever purchase another Harley. I did visit SMHD recently. It had been a year and a half since I went into the last HD dealer. I didn't see anything on their showroom that pulled at me, calling me back. I got back on my Chieftain and headed off, still very pleased with the move.