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Author Topic: How Woman and Men Shower  (Read 2206 times)

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RATMAN

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How Woman and Men Shower
« on: April 23, 2005, 02:48:43 PM »

How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothing and place  them in a sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique   in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumicee stone.

Wash your hair  once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes or until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.  
Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfacesin shower.
Spray mold spotswith Tilex.

Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.



How To Shower Like a Man

Take off  clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your wiener and scatch your behind.

Get in the shower. Wash your face.
Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire  wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel,
shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

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hd-dude

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Re: How Woman and Men Shower
« Reply #1 on: April 23, 2005, 07:50:38 PM »

Welcome to the Site Ratman; Good joke it was worth a good laugh, somehow the wife did not find it funny [smiley=nixweiss.gif].

Jock

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Re: How Woman and Men Shower
« Reply #2 on: April 23, 2005, 09:36:01 PM »

Rat,

Thanks for the humor...enjoy the site...
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booboosboss

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Re: How Woman and Men Shower
« Reply #3 on: April 24, 2005, 01:27:09 AM »

TRUE , TRUE  [smiley=wiseguy.gif]
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MAVERICK

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Re: How Woman and Men Shower
« Reply #4 on: May 20, 2005, 11:52:54 AM »

Yes that would be me!!!!!!
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