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[Jock]

Judge:  “How would you describe a rainbow to a blind man?”

Contestant #3:  “I would tell him that they look like Skittles.”

[Jock]

Judge:  “What is something you cannot help but spend more on?”

Contestant #3:  “Hair coloring”

[Jock]

Judge:  “What is your worst habit?”

Contestant #3:  “Reaching for a man’s junk!”

[Jock]

Judge:  “Do you have any phobias?”

Contestant #4:  “I fear one day that I will be choking in a restaurant and a grizzly of a man will reach around me to perform the Heimlich maneuver.  Bang!  There gone!”

[Jock]

Judge:  “Name something that we do not know about you.”

Contestant #4:  “Well, I swallow swords!”

Judge:  “Damn girl I got something you can swallow.”

Contestant #4:  “I graduated from four-inch pocket knives years ago.”

[Jock]

Judge:  “How would you describe yourself in four words.”

Contestant #4:  “Ready, Willing and Able”

[Jock]

Judge:  “Is there anyone that you have forgotten?”

Contestant #4:  “My third boyfriend.  His tongue must have been made out of sandpaper.  Instead of pleasure it was pain!”

[Grizzly]

Judge:  “Do you have any phobias?”

Contestant #4:  “I fear one day that I will be choking in a restaurant and a grizzly of a man will reach around me to perform the Heimlich maneuver.  Bang!  There gone!”

Did someone mention Grizzly?

I'm here to help.

[Jock]

Judge:  “Do you have any deathbed confessions?”

Contestant #5:  “Not yet but the night is still young.”

[Jock]

Judge:  “What would happen if your man said…Assume the position.”

Contestant #5:  “Well let’s put it this way, there better be some p-butter handy!”

[Jock]

Judge:  “Aside from your whiskey and cigarette diet, what do you do to stay in shape?”

Contestant #5:  “For cardio - it’s sex, for the abs – it’s sex, for legs – it’s sex…Geez I guess it’s all about sex.”

[Jock]

Judge:  “So how do you want to go?

Contestant #5:  “With a smile on my face or perhaps something else on it.”

[Jock]

Judge:  “I see that you are wearing the red, white and blue, are you patriotic?”

Contestant #6:  “Absolutely.  Besides don’t ya like my colors?”

[Jock]

Judge:  “Do you consider a man in uniform a turn-on?”

Contestant #6:  “Hell yes!  Every uniform shows a man’s best assets since the uniform pants are normally tighter than a man wears.”

[Jock]

Judge:  “What’s worse:  a sex tape or sexting?”

Contestant #6:  “Sex tape.  You don’t look as good as you think you do when you make all of those faces.”