Hello Folks,
As always, I want to keep ya’ll in the loop and usually shortly after I receive any new info concerning my battle against the cancer that has become my official permanent bunkmate since September 2009. Well, earlier this afternoon I received a phone call from Dr. O’Donnell my Oncology Doc. He called to answer my request for info regarding the chest x-ray on Friday Aug 5th as well as the quick follow-up CT-scan that I had done about a week latter. And here it is another week later already. Anyway, I repeated everything he said, his statements and his answers to my many questions so Sue who was listening to the one sided conversation could take notes and then write down all that she could. As time has gone on I have more and more difficulty remembering all that was said.
Well here is the short of a much longer conversation. But first let me tell you something; I have stated many times that my Oncology Doctor is an optimist just like my wife. It’s not a bad thing to have optimists around someone like me when I’m such a realist. But, I did wonder if my Doc was of the type of man that would really let me know if things were Bad, instead of the very optimistic point of view that includes the tiring phrase, “it could be worst”. Because that phrase really doesn’t make me feel better at all. lol Today’s call from my Onc Doc answered my concern with the elimination of all doubt. He is perfectly ready, willing and able to shoot the straight poop. He started by asking to speak to me, usually he would chat with Sue and answer any of her questions when he called, however, Nope, today he asked for me. After the niceties with the hellos and great to talk to you sort of stuff the conversation went into a somber tone and he said, “I’m sorry to be calling with such bad news I wish it were better.” Well, let me tell you, that got my attention.
He added, the x-rays showed the tumors that have invaded my lungs have grown and are now growing outward of my lungs and through the lung lining. Because x-rays are inferior to ct-scan and he wanted that ct-scan sooner rather than latter. He also explained that this tumor growth was confirmed with the ct-scan and that is what is causing all the extra and increasing pain.
There will not be any more ct-scans or PET scans except maybe after and if another chemo drug cocktail is agreed upon and I choose to go forward with the chemo regime. Those future ct-scans nad or PET scans would be only to see if the new chemo regime is having a positive effect.
Dr O’Donnell would like to see me on another chemo regime as soon as my blood test allow and hopefully as early as September. I told him, if I even choose to do any more chemo, I definitely will disagree to start until this summer is over. I reminded him how long of a wait it was for this summer while being on chemo for 6 months of winter (Oct-Mar) prior to. I explained I Will Not go through that again. An appointment is set for Sept 2 and I think I’ll bump that to October just for a good grace measure to allow summer to have it’s Indian Summer revisit.
He told me that he will search for any info on trail drugs that might have shown some positive response and we talked about a list of 36 trials going on right now. But with a little overview it was clear to see that I didn’t qualify for any, No, not one of them. The only good point of the trails is to look at the outcome and see if I have a chance of the drug cocktail doing anything positive for me. So, it looks like more hopeing and waiting. But, that is sure better than the alternative. But, time will tell, we are all bound to the tick and tock of time. Enjoy ever second you have, it might be your last.
I asked him about my breathing and pointed out that at times it’s very hard to catch my breath. I also explained that at times without notice I seem to take and extra breath, a very deep one. It’s sort of the type of breath you would take if you were startled. Not scared, just a startled type of breath inward, but, for me at those times of the inward breath much deeper than just a startled breath. His response was it could be that my right side diaphragm if firing off. That seems to be something that is common with the type of diaphragm damage that I have and it’s just another one of those things. Oh well, Just another one of those things. Seems I have a cookie jar full of those things, what’s one more?
All in all, not a great call, however, I do get comfort now knowing that my Onc Doc will be and is straight with me. That concern was heavy on my mind and it is a lighter load now.
So, what’s the plan: Time for a motorcycle ride. Headed for the southland. I have two friends that are tying the knot on Sat the 27th and I plan to have Sue and I there, heat, wind, rain, earthquake, hurricane or not. If I can keep up the pace, Sue and I will be there. So If I don’t answer my phone or get back to quick by e-mail, don’t worry, I’ll be somewhere on two wheels with a smile on my face.
Til the next post
Thanks again for your support
My warmest wishes to all of you
Dad, Sam, chappy, friend