Every other week the neighbor and I at the same time cut our lawns that are the same size and
Every time he always finishes his first no matter how hard and fast I go.
On top of that he's always got a bottle of booze in his hand when he's cutting the grass.
I couldn't contain myself any longer. I walked over and said to him how do you get your grass cut so fast and with a bottle of booze in your hand at the same time. We start at the same time and no matter how hard I try you always finish before me.
The neighbor replies with a slight drunken slour. Well he says, have you seen me out with a sprayer before I cut the grass?
Yes as a matter of fact I have, what's in the sprayer I asked
Whiskey, he replied.
Whiskey I said
Yup whiskey,
You see by giving the grass a shot of whiskey before I start it's half cut.