Some may disagree but I also think the wear is acceptable. Especially, like you stated, due to the high spring pressures from the top end. I don't think any Tappet is going to stand up over the long haul under the operating conditions they have to exist under - high spring pressures, aggressive cam timing(steep ramps) of the stock 255 cams, and the valve train angles ( in that I mean the angle of the pushrods puts a bit of side loading on the tappets and rocker arms - according to my rudimentary understanding of geometry).
The bike is still covered by an ESP until April of 2018, and I probably will extend the ESP, therefore I'm trying to stay with HD parts to avoid any repair coverage concerns with the ESP company. I figure they can't give me to much grief if the components in the bike are HD. If not for that concern I would put the S&S tappets in the bike.