Sean Connery was interviewed by Michael Parkinson, and bragged that despite
being 76 years of age, he could still have sex 3 times a night.
Cilla Black, who was also a guest, looked intrigued. After the show,Cilla
said, "Sean, if I'm not bein too forward, I'd luv to 'ave sex with yer. Lets
go back to my 'ouse, we could 'ave a lorra fun.
So they went back to her place. After a couple of drinks they went off to
bed and had an hour of mad passionate sex together.
Afterwards, Sean says, "If you think that was good, let me shleep for half
an hour, and we can have better shex. But while I'm shleeping, hold my bawls
in your left hand and ma wullie in your right hand".
Cilla looks a bit perplexed, but says "Okay".
He sleeps for half an hour, awakens, and they have even better sex than
before.
Then Sean says, "Cilla, that was wonderful. But if you let me shleep for an
hour, we can have the besht shex yet. You'll have to......."I know Sean. Yer
want me to 'old onto yer bat 'n balls again. No problem hun".
Cilla complies with the routine. The results are absolutely mind
blowing.
Once it's all over, they have a drink, Sean lights a cigarette and Cilla
asks "Sean, tell me, dis 'oldin yer balls in one hand and yer willie in de
other - does it really stimulate yer dat much?"
Sean replies, "No, not at all Cilla, but the last time I shlept with a
*scouser, the b!tch stole ma wallet !".
*Note for the US readership - (with thanks to Wikipedia)
Scouse is the accent and dialect of English found in the north-western English city of Liverpool and in some adjoining urban areas of Merseyside. The Scouse accent is highly distinctive and sounds wholly different from the accents used in the neighbouring regions of Cheshire and rural Lancashire.
Inhabitants of Liverpool are called Liverpudlians, but are more often described by the slang term Scousers - an affectionate term for the biggest bunch of villains in the UK.
And yes - Cilla is from Liverpool
Cheers
Dave
Author
Topic: Brit Joke (Read 558 times)