Subject: A.A.A.D.D.
Recently, I was diagnosed with A. A. A. D. D. - Age Activated Attention
Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I
Look over at my car and decide my car needs washing.
As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the porch
table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go
through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can
under the table, and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put
the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.
But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out
the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check
book off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left. My extra
checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk
where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.
I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside
So, that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting
warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the
counter catches my eye--they need to be watered. I set the Coke down on
the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for
all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water
the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a
container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the
kitchen table.
I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the
remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide
to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the
flowers.
I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the
floor. So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and
wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I
was planning to do.
At the end of the day:
----the car isn't washed,
----the bills aren't paid,
----there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter,
----the flowers don't have enough water,
----there is still only 1 check in my check book,
----I can't find the remote, ----I can't find my glasses,
----and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really
baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired. I
realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail.
Do me a favor, will you? Forward this message to everyone you know,
because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.
Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!
GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC