Draining his glass, Murphy said, 'I must be off. I'm taking night school classes in Vietnamese.'
'Why so?' asked the bartender.
'Well, we've just adopted a Vietnamese baby and I want to know what it says when it grows up,' replied Murphy.
So Molloy rang up the police station and inquired: 'I believe you've caught the burglar who broke into our house last night?'
'Indeed we have,' said the desk sergeant.
'Well,' said Molloy, 'could you ask him how he got in without waking the wife?'
'How would you describe your wife?' asked O'Toole.
'Well,' said Murphy, 'I would say she was an angel.'
'You mean beautiful?' said O'Toole.
'No,' replied Murphy, 'I mean she's always up in the air harping on about something!'
'How's your son Michael?' asked widow McHugh.
'He's at university, taking Medicine,' said Mrs Murphy proudly.
'And is it doing him any good?' said the widow.
The specialist examined our hero and said 'I'm recommending that you be given a cortisone injection.'
Rafferty rang his wife and said 'Guess what? I've impressed them that much they're giving me a car!'
'Are the tablets doing you any good?' asked the doctor.
'Well, to be honest,' said Murphy, 'I haven't started taking them yet.'
'Why ever not?' asked the doctor.
'Well,' said Murphy, 'you told me to swallow them after a hot bath and I haven't finished swallowing the hot bath yet!'