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[BG]

I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women differ
so much.

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT???!!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear..."You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to
my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not
what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one
to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.

We went to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you, she was so excited. She must have thought I
was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how
to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's
fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurt out, "No honey, I don't feel
like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a
baffled, "WHAT??!!!" I then said "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD
this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs
as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy
you?"

Apparently I won't be having sex again until sometime after pigs fly
over a frozen hell!

[Admiral]

Now that was really good.

Could be used as an object lesson for some women,.

      

[arcticdude]

They still wouldn't get it

[Admiral]

Some will, some won't ever get it.

[AZSSE]

I liked this one. Thanks