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[SEUC-OCD]

 10. Did you get any under the tree?
 9. Nice Balls!
 8. Check out Rudolph's honker.
 7. Santa's sack is really bulging.
 6. Lift up the skirt so I can clean underneath.
 5. Did you get a piece of the fruitcake?
 4. I love licking the end 'till it's real sharp and pointy.
 3. From here, you can't tell if they're artificial or real.
 2. Can I interest you in some dark meat?
 1. To get it to stand up straight, try propping it against a wall.