Federal motor vehicle safety standards actually address headlight modulators (FMVSS 108), and if they meet the standards set forth they are legal in all 50 states. However, I haven't been able to find anything in the standard concerning brake light modulators. As we all know, if it isn't specified in a Federal standard the individual states can make their own rules. The best advice is still to check with your state police.
One factor that seems to make a difference in some jurisdictions is the amount of "flashing" involved. Lights that rapidly flash three to five times and then stay on continuously don't seem to be a big problem, but lights that flash constantly while the brakes are applied tend to cause the local constabulary to object. My suggestion, stick with the initial flash and then constant mode, not a constant flash or repeating flash that tends to irritate those behind you while sitting in traffic. If the authorities object, no big deal to just disconnect the module (use insulated spade or bullet terminals for connections). Most such equipment violations don't result in points on your license, or even a fine if you show you "corrected" the problem.
Jerry