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[Screamin_Beagle]

 Ed was in trouble. He forgot his wedding
 anniversary. His wife was
 really mad! She told him, "Tomorrow morning, I
 expect to find a gift in the
 driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds AND IT
 BETTER BE THERE."

 The next morning, Ed got up early and left for
 work. When his wife
 woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough
 there was a small box
 gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

 Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to
 the driveway,
 brought the box back in the house. She opened it and
 found a brand new
 bathroom scale.

 Funeral services for Ed have been scheduled for
 Friday.