A little while ago I saw an ad: Ounces of brain for sale...installed. I found it intriguing, so I gave them a call. They said they had all kinds of brain available and if I was interested, I could book a free consultation.
The following Monday morning at 9am, I'm at their very nice clinic for my free consultation. They explained that I could get an ounce of virtually any type of brain.
Over the last few days I had been thinking that I was getting tired of being an Instrumentation Technician and Electrician, would like a cushy indoor occupation and enjoy helping people. I'd decided that an ounce of installed doctor brain is what I wanted! They quote me a price of $2000 installed. I thought that was pretty reasonable for getting into the well paying prestigious occupation.
Well, they don't just install it right then and there...you have a one week wait, just to make sure it's really what you want. Apparently, it's not reversible. My Wife was very supportive in my wanting to expand my brain, but, was concerned about my choice of brain to be installed. She made a valid point, I hate blood and icky things like infected, puss oozing injuries. Well, back to thinking about what kind of brain I want installed.
I still want to be indoors, and make good money, and not wear out my body anymore. Mmmmm...lawyer....ya, that's it....good money, all indoors, cushy. I call the brain clinic and tell them I've changed my mind, doctor brain is out of the question...now, I am going with lawyer brain. The price is the same...$2000 installed. The one week waiting period starts over again to give you time to think about what your new life will be like and to consult with your family. Once again, my Wife, brings up some valid points.....there are some pros....good money, indoors, belong to a association...but, once again, she thought of the one big downside to being a lawyer....everybody hates lawyers! That would really suck! I couldn't live like that, knowing that most everybody despised me and my kind. Well, lawyer brain was out of the question.
After a couple days of deep thought and soul searching I came to some conclusions. I've been a tradesman all my life....it's what I do, I make good money, am respected for what I do, and don't really hate any part of my job. So, another trade would be a good choice of brain to have installed. I've always been amazed at how a good welder can make a bead look so good and they are instrumental in building refineries, mills and mines! That's it.....and ounce of welder brain installed is what I want.
I call the clinic and express my relief that they have a one week waiting period because I've changed my mind ...again! They say that is fine and actually quite common as this is a major life altering decision that should not be taken lightly. I explained that I could not live with knowing that, being a lawyer, I'd be despised by almost everybody, even my own clients. Since I've been a tradesman for so many years I would like to continue in that area...but, in a different trade, welder. This is fine , an ounce or welder brain can be installed in one week...the price is $100,000.
Whoa....I just about shyte myself at the price! I say, why so much?...a welder has to work outside, gets dirty, doesn't make as much or have the prestige as a doctor or lawyer.
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She says " You know how many welders it takes to get an ounce of brain?"
No offense to any welders....please feel free to insert whatever trade you'd like to poke fun at.
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Topic: Ounces of brain for sale...installed. (Read 640 times)