Since we are relating stories about cats and their wonderful "prizes"...this is a true story, as I could not possibly, even as sick as my mind is, make this one up...
Once upon a time, in an apartment not 5 blocks from where I sit typing this (at work), I had a solid black Persian cat, appropriately named Lucifer. At that particular point in my life...1972...well, let's just say I had a LOT more hair, and was a LOT thinner, and was taking a hiatus from most ordinary responsibilities, like going to school, owning reliable transportation, eating right, etc. Let's just say I was more interested in attaining a higher level of consciousness...or unconsciousness...depending on the substance of choice that day.
Well, in this apartment lived Lucifer, a spiteful little bastard, though I probably deserved some of his spitefulness. Also in this apartment was a water bed...back then they were mostly just a giant plastic sack that you built a frame for out of 2x6 lumber, joined with L brackets, and maybe covered with some kind of cloth or vinyl material. It all resided on the floor. Other odd pieces of furnishings, like painted 1x12's across decoratively painted concrete blocks for the stereo, and whatever I could find, or borrow, made up the balance of the decor. The comforter on this particular water bed was one of those black fake fur things...some here probably have a pretty good picture in their mind's eye of what I'm talking about. I thought it was cool at the time, and so did a few of the young ladies I would meet from time to time in my carefree adventures.
One particular night, I had invited an exceptionally attractive example of "hippie chick" over for a couple of beers and whatever else might be on hand at the time to alter our state of consciousness...particularly hers. Incense was burning, candles, etc. Despite my obvious poverty, she was quite impressed with the decor...which only further proves how "altered" our state of mind was at the time. Well, the night progressed quite nicely, and my well thought out plans to show this young lady the water bed "up close and personal" were going just as I had imagined. As I maneuvered her back to get a better view of the ceiling from the water bed, gently laying her down, imagine my surprise when I felt/smelled something wet and very, very stinky ooze up between my fingers, which were resting on her upper shoulder blade. Dear Lucifer had apparently paid a visit to the water bed that morning and left a little pile of semi-solid cat chit for me to discover...the incense had covered the smell until disturbed again.
Needless to say, I had a cold shower that night....
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Topic: Cat vomit and Dog puke (Read 128602 times)