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Author Topic: Pirate walks into a bar  (Read 2392 times)

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zwild

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Pirate walks into a bar
« on: October 16, 2004, 08:05:26 PM »

This Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants, the bartender thinks this is kinda weird and says to the Pirate "excuse me sir but why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?" and the Pirate replies "Arrr it drives me nuts"
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icybay

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The Correct Way to Come Home Drunk
« Reply #1 on: October 02, 2005, 10:46:23 AM »

The Correct Way to Come Home Drunk

Two married buddies are out drinking one night, when one
turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what
else to do.  Whenever I go home after we've been out
drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the
driveway.  I shut off the engine and coast into the garage.
Take my shoes off before I go into the house, I sneak up the
stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick my foot in the
toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds. I
ease into bed and my wife STILL Wakes Up, and Yells at me for
staying out so late!"

His buddy looks at him and says, "Well, you're obviously
taking the wrong approach. I screech into the driveway,
rev up my engine, slam the door, storm up the steps,
pee hard into the toilet water, then use the full flush,
throw my shoes in the closet, undress in the bedroom,
then jump into bed, slap her on the ass and say! WHO'S HORNY???!!!"
and she acts like she's sound asleep."
It Works Every Time!
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hdnut

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Re: Pirate walks into a bar
« Reply #2 on: October 02, 2005, 11:35:17 AM »

I don't care where your from that's FUNNY!!!! [smiley=bigok.gif]
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hdnut

genolof

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Re: Pirate walks into a bar
« Reply #3 on: October 05, 2005, 01:04:10 PM »

So another pirate walks into a bar.  He has a wooden leg, a hook for an arm and a patch over his eye.  The bartender gets him a drink and asks him what happened to his leg.  The pirate responds "Got it bit off by a shark".  The bartender gets him another drink and asks him what happened to his arm that he needs a hook instead of a hand.  The pirate responds "Got it pulled off in the rigging"  The bardtender says "Wow" gets him another drink and asks what happened to your eye?  The pirate says "One day while looking at the clouds a seagull flies over and craps in my eye"  The bartender says " Well that is too bad but that does not explain why the patch.... The pirate says........................................................
...............................First day with the hook!!!!! [smiley=7.gif]
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