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[arcticdude]

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES:
1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.
2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.
3. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
4. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze.
5. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
6. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

[twincam]

back in my younger days, I used to put a fish aquarum over the alarm clock, then put a cater block on top of the aquarum...... had to get up to move the block, flip the fish tank over to turn off the alarm.....after allthat I was awake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!