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Author Topic: Republican National Convention Schedule  (Read 1403 times)

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Midnight Rider

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Republican National Convention Schedule
« on: September 20, 2007, 12:21:44 PM »
Republican National Convention Schedule

New York, NY

6:00 PM Opening Prayer, led by the Rev. Jerry Falwell
6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance
6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd amendment)
6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing
6:46 PM Seminar #1: Getting your kid a military deferment
7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong
7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries
7:40 PM EPA Address #1: Mercury, it's what's for dinner
8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next
8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh
8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: The Homos are after your children
8:30 PM Roundtable discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only)
8:50 PM Seminar #2: Corporations: the government of the future
9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "I Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man"
9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong
9:10 PM EPA Address #2 Trees: the real cause of forest fires
9:30 PM Break for secret meetings
10:00 PM Second prayer, led by Cal Thomas
10:15 PM Lecture by Karl Rove: Doublespeak made easy
10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration: How to squint and talk macho
10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark deer-in-headlights stare
10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity belt
10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black Republicans
10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong
10:50 PM Seminar #3: Education: a drain on our nation's economy
11:10 PM Hilary Clinton Pinata
11:20 PM Second John Ashcroft Lecture: Evolutionists: the dangerous new cult
11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again
11:35 PM Blame Clinton
11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies
11:50 PM Closing Prayer, led by Jesus Himself
12:00 AM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord

« Last Edit: September 20, 2007, 12:37:57 PM by TCnBham »
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harleyteam

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #1 on: September 23, 2007, 10:19:29 PM »
Damn,,,, I didn't know Hillary had relatives in Alabama.
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Coolbreeze

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #2 on: September 24, 2007, 03:30:36 PM »
Quote from: harleyteam on September 23, 2007, 10:19:29 PM
Damn,,,, I didn't know Hillary had relatives in Alabama.

whoops!  :o  I think that was your outside voice!   ::)   :huepfenlol2: :huepfenlol2: :huepfenlol2:
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Midnight Rider

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #3 on: September 24, 2007, 03:34:39 PM »
Quote from: harleyteam on September 23, 2007, 10:19:29 PM
Damn,,,, I didn't know Hillary had relatives in Alabama.

I thought you knew that we're all related down South, play Banjos, live in trailers, and have two teeth...
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harleyteam

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #4 on: September 24, 2007, 10:20:10 PM »
I knew that,,,, was just tryin ta be polite. :huepfenlol2:
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arcticdude

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #5 on: September 25, 2007, 02:48:50 PM »
Quote from: TCnBham on September 24, 2007, 03:34:39 PM
I thought you knew that we're all related down South, play Banjos, live in trailers, and have two teeth...

Hey wait a second!!!!!  How'd you get two?!?!?!?!!???!?!!!
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Midnight Rider

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #6 on: September 25, 2007, 02:54:52 PM »
Quote from: arcticdude on September 25, 2007, 02:48:50 PM
Hey wait a second!!!!!  How'd you get two?!?!?!?!!???!?!!!

That's per couple, John... ;) ;D
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Coolbreeze

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #7 on: September 25, 2007, 05:55:25 PM »
That's just too close to home.....  kinda like my mom's uncle and aunt in Mississippi, that shared dentures.  :bananarock:
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miker

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #8 on: September 26, 2007, 08:16:50 AM »
Liken to havin a uncledaddy or auntiemomma?  Try n be yer own 1st cousin!

Miker
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Hugh Janis

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #9 on: September 26, 2007, 09:58:51 AM »
The Republican convention runs concurrent with the Democratic, here is the schedule of events for the Democratic...

Democratic National Convention Schedule

Boston, Massachusetts

6:00 PM - Opening Flag Burning Ceremony
6:05 PM - Pledge of Allegiance to the U.N.
6:15 PM - Secular Prayers by Rev. Jesse Jackson and Rev. Al Sharpton
6:30 PM - Antiwar Concert by Barbara Streisand
6:40 PM - Ted Kennedy Proposes a Toast
7:00 PM - Tribute to France
7:10 PM - Collect Offerings for al-Zawahri Defense Fund
7:25 PM - Tribute to Germany
7:45 PM - Antiwar Rally (Moderated by Michael Moore)
8:25 PM - Ted Kennedy Proposes a Toast
8:30 PM - Terrorist Appeasement Workshop
9:00 PM - Roundtable Discussion of Taxes: "Calling for Higher Taxes on Others While You Pay None"
9:15 PM - Bill & Hillary Clinton Host a Seminar on "The Successful Selling of White House & Air Force One Mementos on eBay"
9:20 PM - Gay Marriage Ceremony (Both Male and Female Couples)
9:30 PM - * Intermission * Special Guest Soloist Jane Fonda
10:00 PM - Posting the Iraqi Colors by Sean Penn and Tim Robbins
10:10 PM - Reenactment of Kerry's Fake Medal Toss
10:20 PM - Howard Dean Screamfest 'Yeeearrrrrrrg!'
10:30 PM - Seminar: "The Boy Scouts and Other Paramilitary threats to National Security"
10:40 PM - Ted Kennedy Proposes a Toast
10:45 PM - Abortion Demonstration (NARAL)
11:00 PM - Multiple Gay Marriage Ceremony (Threesomes, Mixed and Same-Sex)
11:15 PM - 'Maximizing Welfare' Workshop
11:30 PM - 'Free Saddam' Pep Rally
11:50 PM - Ted Kennedy Proposes a Toast
12:00 AM - Kerry-Edwards 2004 Sealed With A Kiss
12:01 AM - Ted Kennedy Proposes a Toast
12:02 AM - Ted Kennedy Proposes a Toast
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miker

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Re: Republican National Convention Schedule
« Reply #10 on: September 26, 2007, 10:18:21 AM »
What , no NAMBLA representation, thats not inclusive!   :P
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