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[jaymedic44]

NO NURSING HOME FOR ME!!!

No nursing home for me.   I am checking into the        Holiday Inn!
With the average cost for a nursing home care              costing $188.00 per day, there is a better way                    when we get old and feeble.

I have already checked on reservations at the              Holiday Inn. For a combined long term stay               discount and senior discount, it's $49.23 per                     night.   That leaves  $138.77 a day for:                       Breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and special TV movies. Plus, they provide a spa,  swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc .   Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.
 
$5 worth of tips a day will have the entire staff  scrambling to help you.. They treat you like a           customer, not a patient. There is a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent  limp).
 
To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays.
 
For a change of scenery, take the airport                       shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants             there.   While you're at  the airport, fly                  somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps                         building up.   
 
It takes months to get into decent nursing homes.         Holiday Inn will take your reservation today.                                     And you are not stuck in one place forever, you  can move from Inn to Inn , or even from city to                    city. Want to see  Hawaii ?  They have a Holiday                      Inn there too. TV broken?  Light bulbs need           changing?  Need a mattress replaced?  No                  problem. They fix everything, and apologize for   the inconvenience.       
 
The   Inn  has a night security person and daily                room service. The maid checks to see if you are ok. If not, they will call the undertaker or an ambulance.   If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the  rest of your life.     
 
And no worries about visits from family.  They will always be glad to find you, and  probably check in for a few days mini-vacation.
 The grand kids can use the pool.
What more can you ask for?
 

[casper]

that dont sound bad but how bout a cruise ship, might cost about 75-80 a day but always moving and get to see other ports.