He said to me ... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it
I said to him ... You wear pants don't you?
He said to me ... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said to him ... That's a good idea - you stand by the stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing but fart
He said to me ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him ... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said to me ... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him ... They don't have time
He said to me ... How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him ... I don't know; it has never happened.
He said to me ... Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
I said to him ... They already have boyfriends.
He said to me ... What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said to him ... A widow.
He said to me ... Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him ... Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.