A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while
he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some
Olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats
Them, then jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls,
Sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows it
Whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says "No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table! He swallowed it whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "He eats everything in
Sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."
He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate,
Then leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He
Orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry
On the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his a$$, pulls it out, and eats it.
Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his a$$, pulls it
Out, and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" He
Asks.
"No, what?" replies the guy.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his a$$, pulled them
Out, and ate em!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything
In sight, but ever since he had to chit out that cue ball, he measures
Everything first."
Author
Topic: The Monkey (Read 767 times)