Ekim60,
I went through the same challenges your going through when I was deciding on which bars to buy for my Ultra. After hours of research, looking at pics, reading on this forum, siting on different bikes, talking to the dealer, asking to be measured, and finally putting my seat on a different bike with a set bars I thought would work I finally ordered bars and I'm still not sure I ordered the right ones. I wish I could have went somewhere and tried out different configurations, like the Fatboys they used to have setup at the dealership. After all that rambling, I'll encourage you to take your wife and go get her "fitted" the best you can. Remember its about a total seating position/posture change. How does she want to sit while she rides, leaned forward, back, staight up? Make sure you are using the same seat and suspension she will have on her bike when testing bars. An inch here and and inch there may not seem like much but add up to make huge differences. For some unknown reason not all manufactures seem to measure the bars the same, Cyclesmith has 13's and Yaffe has 12's and from what I've seen the Yaffe bars are taller than the Cyclesmiths. Options are only as endless as your checkbook. Good Luck in your search.
Supershooter